Saturday, March 10, 2012

The Unfortunate Incident Of The Panda And The Chopping Board

When slicing food on this chopping board (one originating in Denmark) earlier this afternoon, I couldn't help but notice the panda-face burn mark on the back. Although I only know this chopping board to have visited Denmark, I'm beginning to wonder if it's had a past in China's Sichuan forests. Just think, my imagination tells me, so this is the result of my instinctive storytelling ability. A small forest fire broke out nearby to the chopping board's location, and an unfortunate panda cub's burnt eyes, nose and face accidentally knocked against the board as the frightened animal scampered back to the safety of its clan. When the atmosphere became calmer, the curious panda cub and his clan ventured out to investigate the "effigy of our cub" that their cub had previously spoken of. The rather intelligent (for pandas) clan soon discovered the reasons for the strange mark, and had the excellent reasoning to think of it as a way to publicize pandas in the Western World. As it happened the religion of this particular panda clan was to always select things at random, in order to tell Luck that they supported her, and this principle applied to choosing which country the chopping board would be sent to. And the one selected was...don't all shout at once...Denmark! As pandas are generally not accepted on human public transport, the clan set off on an epic journey on foot, taking months on end, from Sichuan to Denmark, and then many more months to find a salesman that would accept pandas trading in a chopping board for bamboo instead of money, and then another forever to get back to Sichuan, until their short life in business was over. But back in Denmark, there was an unusual amount of demand for the chopping board, and somehow through the nature of trading the chopping board made its way into our house, therefore concluding the tale. Hope you enjoyed it!
- DP :)
P.S. The actual origin of the chopping board is not clear, but some suggest it was made by a panda clan living close to the subject of this tale, whose religion was not Luck, but Craftmanship.

1 comment:

  1. What a great story! I love the idea of random selection as a way of worshipping Luck.

    Email me on chrisgrollman [at] gmail dotcom and we'll see if we can arrange a dance show.

    A fine, entertaining blog, very impressed.